T.A.P. into the Possibilities

Believe that the possibility exists and then make extraordinary things happen.

Tag Archives: Helping Others


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Motivation Knows No Strangers

Tonight, I met a young actress who was looking for a place to rent for a few months. She said she had been looking on Craig’s List, but had attracted a few questionable replies. I told her that Craig’s List had received some bad press and perhaps she should try other avenues as well. I suggested looking into papers near campuses because they often have vacancies for students who sometimes rent for a few months. I also suggested she ride around the neighborhoods that she wanted to live in because there could be opportunities that are not listed publicly. We both laughed when I suggested facebook, but then we realized that facebook was not a bad idea either.

As we drove down La Cienega Blvd., I noticed a white, plastic H&M bag sitting on the bench at the bus stop. People were driving by and walking by without even noticing the bag sitting conspicuously on the bench. I turned to her and said, “Wouldn’t it be cool if there was money in that bag?” She quickly looked over at the bag and then quickly looked back at me and said with excitement, “Should we check?!? Then her voice dropped and got serious, “If there is money in that bag, we are outta here!” We both laughed and the light changed so we continued down the street joking about paying off our debts, giving money to charity and traveling around the world.

Then, we started to talk about life and I told her that I was really happy with my life right now, but that it was not that way a few months ago. I told her that last year I felt like I no longer had a plan and that I was unsure what I wanted do. I shared with her how I was on track to go to law school, but had not done well on my LSAT. I admitted that my self-sabotage had left me feeling sad, diminished and sometimes I would just sit and cry. She was quiet for a moment and then she said, “I feel that way now.” I looked at her and told her that I had an idea how she felt and I said to her, “No matter how bad it feels right now, you are going to come out of this place in your life and when you do, you are going to be grateful that you survived, like I am right now. I told her that I know it seems like she does not know what she wants to do and that can make a person feel sad and confused, but I assured her that it was alright not to know every step to her future. She slowly shook her head in agreement as she looked out her window as if in deep thought. She continued to listen to me as I said, “We do the best we can in life and sometimes we don’t, but the most important thing is to keep on moving forward. You have to keep moving forward because that is the only way you can come out of it. You will look back on these challenges and know that they were necessary and you will be able to help someone else one day who finds themselves in this position. I paused and then said, “Your trials will be the foundation of your triumph.” She smiled at me and said, she was glad she finally met someone who really understood how she felt; it made her feel less alone.

I gave her my T.A.P. into the Possibilities card and told her that she had no reason to feel alone now because she could call me anytime and I would remind her how fortunate and extraordinary she is. When she got out of my car, she thanked me and told me that my words had really helped her. Before she closed the door, she said cheerfully, “Make sure you go back and get that bag of money we saw.” We both laughed and she walked to her house as I watched until she got inside, I didn’t get a chance to go back and see if our bag of money was still there. It didn’t matter; we both got what we needed. I drove down the street and asked God to look after her and to give her peace of mind and an unburdened heart. I couldn’t help the tears welling up in my eyes as I prayed, but I know it is going to be alright for her and for me.

When I got home, I had a pleasant surprise waiting, a message from her which read: “Hello Teresa…Thank you for your kind words. I really appreciate everything you said and I hope you found a bag of money tonight and paid off all your debts! Have a beautiful evening.” Her message made me smile. You never know what taking the time to listen and encourage someone can do, but I am finding out.


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Compassion by Design

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Artwork near the bus stop on Venice.

I want to remember what these days feel like because last year, for most of the year, I understood what it meant to not have a clue about what I wanted to do with my life. After seven years of being at a community college and then UCLA, my life was planned out seven years ahead of me and it was comfortable for me to know that I had a plan. In my last semester at UCLA, I decided to go to law school. I thought I would be good at it because I am always reaching out and helping people with situations that require creative communication and the power of persuasion. I left UCLA in 2012 with College Honors and was selected from a pool of Law Fellows to work as a case assistant at a law firm in downtown Los Angeles. The experience removed the tint of fairy-tale hues from my glasses and gave me something to think about. I was concerned because it did not feel right. I felt like my talents were not being used, that I was being underestimated and underappreciated. My personality seemed to be too joyous, optimistic and compassionate for the firm. I was confused and often disappointed at the way in which I was treated, but I chalked it up to something I had to go through in order to learn a valuable lesson. That lesson was that when I was in my proper element, I would not feel that way.

My friends know me as someone who is generous and compassionate about the needs of others. I have had some friends marvel over how I will give someone my last five dollars when I do not know where my next meal is coming from. I will tell you this. In my world, kindness is key. Not only when it is convenient, but especially when it is not convenient. When I see that someone needs help, i am compelled to do what I can to help them. It feels natural, it feels comfortable and it feels very fulfilling. Almost unlike anything else that I do in my life with the exception of singing in the studio. I look for situations where I can be of service in everyday situations. Two such situations happened today and that is what I want to share. I knew that I had not been here to blog on my page, I was too sad and didn’t feel inspired to write. I never got rid of my blog though because I knew it was born for a reason and that when I was ready, I would return to write and encourage others. It waited for me and it was not in vain. Here is my story…

I was driving down Venice Boulevard on my way to the Department of Motor Vehicles in Culver City when I spotted a young woman standing on the bus stop. Her nose was bandaged and she looked like she was in a hurry. I thought to myself that her injuries must be from abuse. I don’t know why I thought that instead of that she had a nose job. As I sat at the traffic light, a bus pulled up and she rushed to meet it, since the driver may not have seen her, but it passed her and pulled up behind me. In my rear view mirror, I could see that she had reached the door of the bus and was motioning for permission to be admitted. The bus driver ignored her and made a dismissive motion with his hand for her to get out of the street. When the light turned green I sat there, in hopes that he would see traffic was not moving and he could pick her up. He began to blow his horn at me so after a few more seconds, I reluctantly moved forward…slowly. Our eyes met as I glanced into my rear view mirror and I just shook my head in disappointment.

I knew in my heart that I had to help her get to her destination so I drove until I could safely turn around and then I went back to where I saw her. It seemed like traffic had slowed down to prevent me from my mission and I was afraid I would miss her. When I realized that I was getting anxious, I said to myself, “Calm down, you are just excited and if she is not there, it will be because a bus picked her up so either way it is a good thing.” Talking to myself helps me to relax when my emotions get fired up. I made my final U-turn and saw the #33 bus in the distance coming down Venice. As I drove up, I saw her talking to a mechanic at the shop behind her. I had already rolled down my window so I could talk to her. I waited a moment and she turned around and I smiled and said, “I can’t believe that bus driver did not pick you up. I was right in front of him and I saw what happened. There is a bus coming behind me, but if you want to let me give you a ride, I would be honored to do that.” She smiled and did not hesitate to thank me and ask me if I was sure. I told her I was sure; it was totally up to her. She accepted my invitation and got into my car. The first thing she said to me after thanking me profusely was that God was so good to her and that she was standing on the bus stop professing her love for Him after the bus had left her standing at the designated bus stop. She gave me directions and told me how grateful she was. Every other thought she expressed was about how wonderful God was and then she admitted to me that she had been battered by her boyfriend so badly that she had needed surgery. When I told her that I knew, she just looked at me and said, “You are an angel and your wings are so tightly tucked that I didn’t see them at first.” I smiled and asked myself how I even knew she had been battered.

We rode down Venice as she told me she had found a place that does reconstructive surgery on women who can’t afford it. She praised God for being chosen to receive the free service. The funny thing is that though I was driving with the flow of traffic and paying close attention, cars were beeping their horns at me. It was strange. I told her it was if they were trying to disturb the joy we had created with our conversation and praise. She agreed and told me she had thought the same thing. We both laughed and kept on talking. It wasn’t until I got to her destination that I asked what her name was. She smiled and told me it was Shani. I told her that she had a beautiful name and that she was a beautiful person. I told her she was a good person and I meant it. She asked if she could have my number so I gave it to her. She then asked if she could give me a hug and I gladly hugged her. As she got out of my car, I told her once again that she was a good person. She smiled and waved at me as I drove off smiling. I had a feeling that I was right where I was supposed to be. I felt appreciated and I felt grateful that I had helped someone. I felt blessed and I felt worthy. It was feeling that I carried on to my next experience at the underpass…


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To Remain Undaunted

I thought when I arrived at this point in my life, things would be different for me. The truth is, it is different, but not in the ways that I had imagined. You see, I just graduated from college at the age of 52. I had started thinking about my life in 2005 and realized that time was really passing fast. I decided that if time was going to go by so quickly that I should have something positive to show for it. So, I quit my job of 15 years and decided to take advantage of upward mobility at new job and go back to school after 26 years. I didn’t give it a great deal of thought because I would have talked myself out of it, but it seemed like a good idea so I went with it.

I found myself sitting in a classroom at Santa Monica college, exhausted from working 40+hours a week and saying to myself, “What in the hell were you thinking?” I was snapped out of my growing self-pity by the sound of the Professor’s voice and then I remembered what I had been thinking. I had been thinking that I wanted to have something to show for my life and that I wanted to earn my A.A. and then transfer to UCLA for my B.A. I was thinking that my brother had done everything right in his life; participating in sports, getting good grades and going to two prestigious colleges only to die of colon cancer at the age of 24 while he was studying law at Boston College. His friends would roll him to class in a wheelchair and he would struggle against daunting odds to continue his education. How could I feel exhausted? I was being a big baby, that was what I was thinking. Did I think it was going to be easy? Well, I hadn’t really thought about the easy or the hard of it, I just jumped into the challenge. Sometimes that is good strategy and I was hoping this would be one of those times.

I studied hard in school and I struggled when it felt like I was more sad than happy. It was during those times that I had to try three times harder just to maintain my grades. When I was feeling down, I hung on for that little piece of me that was assuring me that I could do it and that I was going to feel better. The little voice was shouting at me, but all I could hear was a whisper, but I kept on listening anyway. As long as I could hear even a whisper of encouragement, I could keep on going.

Now, after seven years on the best academic journey of my life, I am starting a new journey…law school. I am excited and a little scared, but I know that pushing forward is the only option I have unless I give up and THAT is not an option. I realize that I am an nontraditional student and I am accomplishing things using a different timeline than most, but that is what makes everything so special.

I am a big believer in paying it forward so as I move along, I help others like the time I heard a young guy on campus talking to his friend. He didn’t know if he was doing the right thing, but I overheard what he was doing in his life and the confusion in his voice and knew he just needed some encouragement. When I finished eating, I went over to his table and said, “Excuse me, “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I heard what you were saying and I just wanted to tell you two things: I am proud of you and keep going because you are on the right path.” He smiled at me and said, “Thanks.” I could see in his face that he was grateful for the validation. As I walked away, I heard his friend ask him, “Do you know her?” to which he answered “No.” His friend then said, “That’s pretty cool, though.” And he said “Yea, huh.”

Just think how great it would be if we all took the chance to do something like that for others and even for ourselves. When I need encouragement, it comes to me unexpectedly from places I least expect it and I am always grateful. Take for instance, this blog. It is helping me too express my ideas and give me a sense of peace at the same time. I can’t ask for more than that, but I will.


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Just When I Doubted Myself…

The truth is, I have been putting on a brave face. I have been having small doubts about being able to manage the next round of my goals and then it happened… I was driving down Venice Blvd and I saw a man in a wheelchair trying to put a cover over the windshield of a motor home. I don’t have to remind you how high up that is. Anyway, there he was with one of those clutch things patiently putting the leather cover over the window. I looked at him in my rear view mirror as I passed him. Then I had this lingering feeling. Had I not just put in my Law Fellows personal statement that “when I see someone in need, I am compelled to help them”? Did I lie? I turned my car around and asked him if he needed help. He said “I am trying to put the cover on, I can do it.” I parked in an auto repair driveway and told the guy, that was looking at me like I was crazy, that I would not be long. I put the leather cover over the windshield and windows for the man in the wheelchair while we chatted. He said he could not believe I turned around. I was thinking to myself that I could not believe I hesitated. We laughed and he thanked me and I was on my way.

There are a few lessons here:

1. If he can put on a windshield cover from a wheel chair, I can surely master the LSAT and law school.

2. Anything you think you can do, you can.

3. I have to focus on my strengths and not my weaknesses.